Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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