I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
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