I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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