Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize