yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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