I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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