Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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