it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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