why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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