RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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