90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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