do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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