I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize