i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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