me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
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