Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
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Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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