Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize