i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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