Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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