and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
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I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
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I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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