There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize