Porn is love you can see.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
This baby is an asshole
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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