she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
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Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
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I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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