let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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