worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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