More tranny stories later!
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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