So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
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These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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