if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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