gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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