school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
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by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
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I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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