ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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