So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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