Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize