i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize