I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Sorry my hands just texted you
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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