Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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