I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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