I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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