so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
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They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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