At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
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he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
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So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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