Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize