i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
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He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
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look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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