just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize