I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize