I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize