We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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