I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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