She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize