Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize