at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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